in everything there is a season

the challenge.

2008-06-23T01:09:00.002+08:00

i choose to be, holy,

set apart for You my Master,

ready to do Your will.

i'm hungry.

2008-06-22T01:28:00.002+08:00

it feels good that exams are over.
it kinda struck me today how quickly this semester went by.
it seemed like just yesterday when i was still in singapore working in innotrek.
but like, this semester just came and went!
made new friends, made closer friends, made even better friends.

exams werent the best, but i think they went okay.
2nd year got harder, but i guess thats just life, eh?

but it feels good to have friends that care (:
thank God for friends.

this semester was great (:
i'm really looking forward to july..
winter camp -> hillsong in sydney -> melb -> perth.
hiphurrah!

church early early tmr (:
i better sleep soon.
among other things, i got a car!
yay.
now to finish my hours :S
okay sleep.
bye!

RAINBOWS I SAW TODAY = 2

2008-06-16T16:45:00.000+08:00

I SEE IT AGAIN!
TWICE TODAY!

I SAW A RAINBOW OUTSIDE MY WINDOW

2008-06-16T16:26:00.003+08:00

for about one minute i was reminded of God's greatness (:
i saw a pretty rainbow just now in the window of my seat at reid library. hehe. it was so pretty, the colours was so bright and did i mention, pretty? AH!

i tried to take a photo of it, but then my phone made a noise so loud everyone looked at me :S so embarrassing, and when i looked up again the rainbow was gone!

):

i cant take anymore photos now.

but yay, today God reminded me that He is a good God. and i feel comforted by that :D
exams will be just fine (:

focus.

2008-06-12T01:36:00.004+08:00

this is my cry,

my one desire.

just to be with You,

Jesus.

-One Desire, Hillsong

a song of praise. (:

2008-06-10T18:53:00.004+08:00

You are beautiful beyond description
You are beautiful beyond description,
Too marvellous for words,
Too wonderful for comprehension,
Like nothing ever seen or heard.

Who can grasp Your infinite wisdom?
Who can fanthom the depths of Your love?
You are beautiful beyond description
Majesty enthroned above.

And i stand i stand in awe of You
i stand i stand in awe of You
Holy God to whom, all praise is due,
I stand in awe of You.

yet another emo post.

2008-06-03T16:06:00.003+08:00

exams are coming in just 2 weeks, but i just dont have the motivation to study.

i feel like going on a sabbatical. i really cannot wait for july to come.

please pray for me because i think i've just been too distracted, for lack of a better word, to study. i dont like it when i get stressed from problems because i just run away and hide in my corner, watch disney to make my problems disappear, or sleep so that when i wake up i forget.

maybe its time to be reminded of Ecclesaistes 3:1-8

There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity under heaven:

A time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,

a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,

a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,

a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,

a time for war and a time for peace.

and even though i cannot begin to understand things from God's perspective because i refuse to see things differently from my own, even when i become too impatient to wait for things in God's own special timing, God still promises to make everything beautiful in its time, because He is sovereign.

please pray for me.

in eager anticipation

2008-05-31T16:13:00.003+08:00

i havent been this excited about something in a while! (: i have a brillant plan for next semester and convention fundraising! i'm so eager to see how God can use me in this area and how God can use OCF this year to not only fundraise for convention, but to use their gifts and talents to really worship God! i think its gonna be GREAT and BIG!

i can do big things too (:

2008-05-25T23:04:00.006+08:00

heard this in joel's car today..

big things too - vegetales
Junior:
They're big
I'm little.
They go.
I twiddle.
Why can't little guys do big things too?

Archibald:
You're not going to sing, are you?
Couldn't you just play your harp and I'll throw things at you? Oh.

Junior:
You're big
I'm little.
My head only comes to your middle
But I say little guys can do big things too!

Archibald:
Yes, but...Goliath! He's...

Junior:
He's big
But God's bigger!
And when I think of Him that's when I figure
With His help little guys can do big things, too!

Archibald:
Oh. I see what you're saying!
Alright, I understand...
now let's suppose that this is true.
You still look rather wimpy, but I know what we can do!
Just step behind this curtain, it will only take a minute.
There's a closet in the corner and you'll like what I've got in it.
You'll find my royal armor there, don't dally, put it on!
Yes, now you'll look much bigger when the battle lines are drawn!
One more thing you'll need, I think - pick up my royal sword.
It's a big one, and a beauty!
The best we could afford!
Once you've got it all together, I think you will agree.
You're bound to do much better if you try to look like me!

Oh dear.

Junior:
Ya' know, I think maybe I should just be plain old me.

Archibald:
Oh. yes.
Well, I suppose,
But have you seen Goliath?
Why, he's...he's just...he's...

Junior:
He's big.
But God's bigger!
And when I think of him, that's what I figure...

Archibald:
With His help little guys can do big things?

Junior:
With His help I know I can do big things!

Both:
With His help little guys can do big things, too!!

Archibald:
Alright...
If you're sure you know what you're getting into.
Oh dear.

haha, so cute, the song!
but i like the part how it says, with His help little guys can do big things too (:

"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength!" says Paul to the phillipians

i want to watch sex and the city (the movie) and prince caspian and they both come out before the exams ): boo.

and i had unsalty wang wangs for supper. yucks.

its a great day...

2008-05-25T01:46:00.004+08:00

... to praise the Lord!
i was feeling miserable the past few days.. but i'm happy again! (:

today work was demoralising. i've been struggling to not compromise being a christian at work, but alot of times i'm too stubborn to change my bad habits. i think at times my pride is too big to admit that i've made a mistake ): i guess my manager has been pretty gracious with me. i dont like it when i disappoint people though. everyone just gets into a tizzy and we all have to cover up that mistake with a thousand apologies and everything just gets messed up. hm.

oh and i found out that kate from work likes pink marshmallows and i love the white ones! we're gonna buy packets of marshmallows and share them from now on. ha.

exams are around the corner! just a couple more weeks.. ah stress! i havent started studying yet. i'm meant to start on monday! but i think i should start tmr instead because i foresee this week being very busy again. its a good thing that i reduced my hours to just saturdays nights now. so i have more nights to study late into. whoohoo. (but unlikely to study "late into" because the weather will be terribly awful next week, so there will be alot of sleeping involved. :S)

i need to do laundry soon. esha and i were talking about having a magical wand that will do things for us. like when she points at her lab report it will automatically write itself, and when i point at my computer all my lectopias will be done for me and all the information will be downloaded into my head, and i can point the wand at my overflowing laundry basket and all my laundry will be washed, dried and stored into my still very full cupboard. hmm. the perils of wet weather and 2 housemates. kidding. i'm just being lazy :P as always.

i watched the man u chelsea match thurs arvo when they replayed it cos i was asleep at 2.45am in the morning so i totally missed the match and the penalties were so intense! i was pretty disappointed with ronaldo cos he missed his penalty shot! my secret boyfriend was totally un-amazing. but i suppose i should be a more supportive secret girlfriend. haha! plus, i thought it was so hilarious when terry slipped and fell. that was such a huge relief because i thought we were going to lose.. (but of course i knew that we won anyway. just pressured from the penalties.. ha)

bible study was pretty good on friday. i'm glad that everyone's starting to warm up to each other and more willing to share without me having to arrow people. i really dont like doing that. the girls have been going strong with dg as well! i'm encouraged to see so many of them still so faithful turning up at dg even though school work is so heavy now..

we had alot of weird comments at bs lately. hahah! chok giving us body language 101 lessons about how if your knees point in one direction towards someone means you like the person! haha so rubbish! and we girls were talking about shopping, as usual. zhiqi's favourite topic (: country road and victoria secret sales. how i love only white marshmallows. how wonderful my cooking was on friday (: how josh sim has no mercy! (we did a spiritual gifts test recently and he had a perfect zero score for mercy! haha) i'm enjoying all these little conversations and i'm thankful our friendships within our bs group has been growing so far (: (:

busy bee! i should sleep otherwise i'll be dozing off during sermon tmr! and whoohoo! did i mention its kids style worship this sunday! i love kids style worship! why cant i be on this term for children's ministry! i'd be able to do the actions without feeling embarrassed. haha. oh well (:

night again!

Business Econometrics, hmmm :|

2008-05-22T23:44:00.004+08:00

i finished half of my BE assignment yay! i'm happy i know whats going on (: i feel so proud of myself. now just to wait for the BE midsem results. i think its coming out next week! yikes. i dont think i'll do very well, especially after he went through the answers.. but in any case, i feel accomplished because i sat down with malcolm and taught him the basics of econometrics. hopefully he passes!

BE is so hard, i kinda regret that i took it. i really dont understand whats going on! but it still beats finance, thats alot worse than BE. i'm also clueless in ITF, and i'm behind in myfinancelab! i have to finish it in 3 weeks and i have a lot to do since the midsem :S how quickly time passes when you have so much to do!

i dont like school.

i was talking to naomi from work a couple of weeks back about how difficult it is to juggle school and work (naomi studies postgrad education (: ) and we both had assignments and exams that we did so well in that we were amazed even how we managed to achieve it! i'm pretty sure it was all God's work not my own! my God has been so faithful to me!

i guess i should stop complaining about how bad school has been! at least i didnt have to survive a cyclone like the people in burma and china did. we were praying for burma and china last friday at OCF, and i guess one thing that really hit home was the question of why God allowed such a disaster to happen. and there was a particular prayer point about for the christians in burma and china, that they might stand strong in the midst of the chaos and struggle to believe that God had a bigger plan behind the suffering that they were facing and the challenge of staying close to God in this tough time. i think this point challenged me to think about me and my faith. i think, without a doubt, that if i were burmese or a chinese national i would i have struggled to find a cornerstone where i could firmly say that God is with me.

anyhoo. i've been very tired recently, i dont know whats wrong with my body. i slept 12 hours last night its crazy! i even missed the man u match cos i was so tired. i'm tired again now, and its only 12am! maybe its cos of the erratic weather (cold and hot and rainy and sunny all at the same time), maybe its because its starting to get dark at 5.30 again (the perils of winter), and i have school :s which makes me sleepy.

i think with regards to school i should start to face each trial of not giving up on my units but instead have hope that God will be able to provide my every need.

life is cruel sometimes, but like serene says, when life throws you sour lemons, make sweet lemonade! (:

a humbling day.

2008-05-21T22:20:00.002+08:00

Who am i
Who am i
That the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt

Who am i
That Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who i am
But because of what you've done
Not because of what i've done
But because of who you are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tommorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapour in the wind
Still You hear me when i'm calling
Lord You catch me when i'm falling
You told me who i am
i am Yours

Who am i
That the Eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again

Who am i
That the voice that calm the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

i was reminded of this song today. it humbles me to know that the God that created the universe cares for me, and wants to have a relationship with me, even though i have achieved nothing, even though i am broken, even though i am not perfect.

james fu yu bin

2008-05-18T23:21:00.003+08:00

happy birthday best friend (:

"Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become chilren of God, children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God."

- John 1:12-13

a short note.

2008-05-14T01:43:00.004+08:00

today was pretty eventful :) and i feel like a whole weight is lifted off my chest. i'm happy things have turned out the way it did today, and i think i need to thank God for His strength today. maybe things didn't exactly turn out the way i wanted it to, but perhaps i need to learn to trust God's plan for my life.

essay is due on friday! and i've got tons of things on this week especially tmr. school, DG, CBS leaders meeting, all almost back to back! ah! i think i only have thurs night to do it.. roar roar roar.

but yes, God is good and He will see me through the last 2 weeks of crazy assignments, then its time for a break, then crazy mugging again for finals.

btw i'm hungry :S

attack of the green-eyed monster.

2008-05-12T23:47:00.004+08:00

i dont like it when i'm filled with jealousy. it makes me get so uptight, down, quiet, stressed and filled with frustration ): its not a nice feeling...

in other news.. I PLAYED INTERCOLLEGE SOCCER FOR CURRIE HALL OVER THE WEEKEND! and i realise how unfit i am. my lungs hurt when i breathe, my hamstrings hurt when i walk, my armpits and shoulders are sore! probably the reason why i had 3 long naps today! but it was fun (: although i must say my eye-leg-ball coordination is quite bad. i liked my position, i play midfield on the right (that's my secret boyfriend's position! :D -if you didnt know who this is already its cristiano ronaldo heehee)

man u played on sunday too! i felt quite sad for ronaldo because he looked so upset everytime he didnt score.. but it was a good job on his part anyway. its all a team effort (i realise after playing soccer) and he is so fit! and cute, and hunky. (see picture above, ignore ferguson!) -swoons- he's my hero! :D (but giggs still saves the day anyway. hehe.) and we WON the premier league! see you on the 21st/22nd may champs match! red people will win the blue people! lalalalalala.

glory glory man united! :D

struggling

2008-05-06T21:30:00.002+08:00

when life throws me a million and one things to put on my to do list, i tuck myself in bed and sleep wishing everything will just disappear, or i watch disney channel and live in my oblivion. this is not good. i have my BE midsem on friday, and i'm not even halfway through studying for it ):

somehow this week i have been relying on God's wonderful grace, something that i totally dont deserve, perhaps because of the minimal efforts that i have been putting into anything and everything. perhaps a not-so-nice way of putting it is that i have been half-hearted and lukewarm in the things that i do. yet God's grace never fails to amaze with the things that He has blessed me with or even the motivation to just keep going..

today we had bible study leaders' meeting on Daniel 3, and i was reflecting earlier in the day on Daniel 1 and 2 about how God is so determined to display His glory to His people, or maybe a better way to put it is that God wants so much for us to know His power and sovereignty in every situation, in every aspect of our lives, in every trial we face.

maybe my pessimistic and idealistic perspective needs abit of faith that by God's strength i complete more than i can imagine and i can keep moving on like a choo choo train (: slow, but steady, constant and never faltering, never doubting.

a call to be holy

2008-05-05T14:05:00.008+08:00

"I am God Almighty, walk before me and be blameless"

Gen 17:1

"Never again will i curse the ground because of man, even though every inclination of his heart is evil from childhood"

Gen 8:21

"But your iniquities have seperated you from God, your sins have hidden His face from you so that He will not hear"

Isaiah 59:2

"'Is not Ephraim My dear son, the child in whom I delight? Though I often speak against him, I still remember him. Therefore My heart yearns for him; I have great compassion for him,' declares the Lord."

Jeremiah 31:20

i want to be a bum.

2008-05-03T11:55:00.004+08:00

the past few weeks have gone by quite mechanically. its strange, i like spontaneity. i dont like sequences.. but then im starting to realise maybe i need some regularity because time just seems to fly out the window, and its saturday again, and i'm rushing dg materials, catching up on missed lectures (only because i had exam this week! disclaimer :P), getting ready for work and being there on time. everything just seems rushed and a blur.

maybe i'm just too packed with my time. too many things on my to do list. maybe its just about being organised.

i just wish i can do the things i enjoy doing.

read a book
talk to people
look at the sky (sunrise, sunset, stars)
travel
crossroads
and maybe some disney channel along the way :P

i want to savour the moment and enjoy the process.

or maybe i should just be happy to be blessed that i have the previlege to do so many things and just be try to be good at everything..

hmm.

happy 18th, jeannie (:

2008-04-23T01:02:00.004+08:00

2006: i got to know you because our parents started talking to each other at the new boarder's orientation.. its so strange how God placed you in my life.. from the moments where we tried to exercise, the walks we had to the oval, sometimes with annie, and not to the beach because your parents didnt give you permission to go to the beach; to the moments we had sneaking around in the middle of the night from my/your room back to your/my room because we spent the whole night talking to each other even though it was past lights out, trapiezing down to the music centre so that we can use the pianos there and hear you practice your singing.. drawing the mei lamppost poster and spying on her and her new found friend that is a boy (heehee), swimming (or rather i swim you float), shopping at karrinyup shopping centre, cam whoring (as usual), the moments we shared out of the boarding house at your old house in east perth, cooking, studying, going for ocf, church... oh! not to forget my mini surprise birthday celebration that you and aliya planned! i think 2006 was our best year ever, despite being confined into the BH, we still managed to find that space to share our troubles, tears, excitement, joy..
2007: i went to uni and you were still stuck in the BH ): it was so sad because i didnt get to see you as much. i got busy with uni, you got busy with yr 12.. i wasnt as much a part of your life as i was in 2006.. but it was a good year nevertheless (: then came geri and joash and we became a quadruplet instead of evil twins!
2008: this year so far has been good, its so good to see you so much more involved in OCF.. and i get to see you more and more because of that! shopping, cam whoring (nothing changed), drawing stupid pictures, dinners at mine and at yours.. playing guitar, telepathic dress sense, laughing at esther, sharing about boy problems, leading our own bs groups.. i see how God has been providing for us and growing us each year whether we're together or seperate, and i'm sure God will be faithful to provide us with more memorable moments this year where He will use both of us to encourage each other and spur each other on to becoming more like Him each day..
happy birthday jeannie (: i hope this will be a very enjoyable day for you.. i love you! (:

i had a glimpse of God's love last night.

2008-04-18T10:13:00.006+08:00

incredibly patient, tender, kind, gentle

focussed, unwavering, never changing in magnitude

jealous, strong, powerful.

if only, if only i could learn to love like He does.

A graph of how willing i am to trade my definition of love for God's definition of love

(my utility function is probably theoretically wrong.. i'm so screwed for my micro exam later ): )

"Some things are loved because they are worthy; but some things are worthy because they are loved" - Pastor Ian Pitt-Watson

some kind of realisation.

2008-04-17T13:39:00.003+08:00

it has just painfully occurred to me how incredibly patient our God must be with me because as i read the verse phil 1:6, "Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to the completion until the day of Christ Jesus"...

it seems like there is still a long long LONG long way to go before i become perfect in His sight.

little prayers to God.

2008-04-15T17:30:00.004+08:00

every week we get an email about the prayer requests from the children at sunday school and with every week's immense lack of time i always just skim through what i thought were childish prayer requests and i just move on to the more important email of the two that i get from shari, ie the lesson plan for the following week.

but strangely this time i took the time to read through each request and i just feel so ignorant to how much love and innocence these children have..

Jason- Pray for my mother and father to become full Christians
Brendan- Pray for my dog to get better and be the normal dog he used to be
Worried about dying
Thankful for my dog not dying
Joy- Pray for more confidence and for more friends. For my brother’s teeth
Worried about my future
Thankful for everything (but not satan)
Joshua O-Pray my grandparents become Christians
Thankful that Jesus died on the cross for us
Hanna- Pray for my grandparents to have a safe trip here
Thankful for all the air and food and water and family
Brienzi- Pray for my Aunt
Worried my Uncle will turn away from God

and these are just some of the prayer requests we got this week.. i wonder if i actually got more self centered as i grew older..

"Then little children were brought to Jesus for Him to place His hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked those who brought them.
Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." When He had placed His hands on them, He went on from there."
-Matthew 19:13-15

a thorn in my side.

2008-04-14T14:27:00.005+08:00

"But you, O Israel, my servant,

Jacob, whom I have chosen,

you descendants of Abraham my friend,

I took you from the ends of the earth,

from its farthest corners I called you.

I said, 'You are my servant';

I have chosen you and have not rejected you.

So do not fear, for I am with you;

do not be dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you;

I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."

- Isaiah 41:8-10

distracted.

2008-03-30T17:15:00.003+08:00

AH. i'm so behind in my work, i keep leaving it to the last minute. so many things going on, its so hard to keep track of time! maybe i need to learn how to prioritise..

as of now i have yet to complete my tutes for all 4 units, my BE assignment and get a head start on studying for mid sems which is just around the corner, like in 2 weeks! i am so dead, and i am still so distracted.. it is already the FIFTH week of school. which means i have been back in perth for almost 2 whole months! already! which means semester is ending in like another 3 more months.. which means exams are coming.. :/ not good at all.

but in other areas of my life, things seem to have been going rather smoothly. my not-so-scary-after-all experience leading worship has led me to think that worship leading isnt that bad after all. maybe i should try it more often. its just so strange how God uses me in strange ways. i even shared about things that i wasnt planning to share in the first place! somehow i didnt stumble or stutter over words and i didnt blank out! Surely God was with me there and then. (:(: BS leading was quite interesting. and as unprepared as i was that night (i forgot to bring my prepared answers), somehow i managed to remember what was discussed at the BS leaders meeting and what pastor timon brought up at the BS leaders training! unbelievable for such a poor memory like mine. it did take a while for my group to warm up to each other and to answering the BS questions, but i'm glad that things turned out okay in the end. yay! i had been worrying for nothing (:

so moral of the story? a passage came to mind..
"Therefore i tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consder the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; uet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? ... O you of little faith! ... But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and these things will be given to you as well. Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. Sell your posessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Luke 12:22-34

haha, just more excuse not to do my work! :P dont worry i'm trying to do it now.. :/

just another fairytale.

2008-03-28T02:51:00.005+08:00

jeannie sent me her collection of the Enchanted Soundtrack today, and I CANT STOP LISTENING TO IT!

the music in this song is quite beautiful, but it makes me feel so sad..

So Close - Jon McLaughlin
You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close

How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?

We’re so close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close, so close
And still so far

that little voice.

2008-03-24T23:58:00.003+08:00

sometimes i can be so in awe of God. in awe of what He did for me, in awe of what He does to me everyday, in awe of what He has in store for me in the days to come.

yet sometimes i feel like God has hidden Himself from me.

when things are going good, God seems to be there. but where is God when things start to fall apart? where is God when i'm suffering, when i've got too much to worry about, to handle, when i'm too afraid of failing?

perhaps God has been reminding me that in the midst of my struggles, in the midst of the overwhelming, in the midst of being lonely, i can find comfort in Him. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-3 my faith, is probably even smaller than a mustard seed.

so its quite appropriate that we're doing daniel for BS this semester in OCF. i think as God uses me to lead BS this year maybe i'll get more out of it than i'll imagine. its interesting how God manifested His sovereignty through daniel's life, but i guess more important to me is how daniel trusted in and depended on God even in his time of persecution..

i think you better pray for me for this friday. i think i need it alot! leading worship and bs and doing convention publicity! OH MAN! i hope God puts words into my mouth because i probably need it! i guess pray that i wont be too involved in the technicalities, but focus on worshipping and leading others to worship Him. oh and of course, confidence to speak in front of a sizeable crowd! (:

i better sleep..

happy easter!

2008-03-23T20:42:00.002+08:00

a sense of joy for hannah washed over me as i watched her get baptised! her reason? because she wanted to show the world that she had a BIG HEART FOR JESUS! (: i was so proud of her today when she proclaimed her decision. yay hannah! i think it was quite the big eye opener for the other kids as well when we brought them over to the main service to watch her get baptised. it surely did let them think abit more seriously about following Jesus.. and it is heartwarming to see them make that step. i guess thats why i'm in children's ministry; so that i remind myself that all it takes is to believe in Jesus and that He rose from the dead, so that we conquer sin and death!

"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven." - Matthew 18:3-4

camwhore good friday (:

2008-03-22T00:55:00.001+08:00

oh it was fun. i adopted josey (the [SO CUTE!] big stuffed monkey who typically resides in josiah's car) for the weekend while he's away at the nlcc camp! whoohoo! jeannie and i started taking pictures with the toy and got carried away with the photos, as you can tell. there are plenty, plenty more. feels nostalgic: like little kids digging into their mom's makeup kit for the first time and playing with the colours.. sneaking around taking photos of youyan cooking and esther studying. disclaimer, we were on a break. (just in case you were wondering why it seems like we werent doing any work) pretty pretty pictures (:

lazy mornings

2008-03-19T22:44:00.003+08:00

and nice, cold, beautiful mornings.
no sun in your face.
just a cool breeze.

yupp. thats what mornings have been like so far.. and its not good because i have been sleeping too much and waking up too late. take the past 2 mornings for example. ive been waking up just 10 mins before each lecture started, i.e. having me waking up and rushing around the house, in and out of the toilet, rummaging through the closet #1 time, clothes dont match, grab some pins, stuff into pockets, rummage through closet #2 time, just throw on some daggy tshirt and stick to the same pair of jeans! then realise that i havent packed my bags so throw everything thats on my table into my big bag and race to the LT and find a seat somewhere, obscure, so that people dont look when i come into the LT looking all just woken up.. yupp, that has been 2 mornings, straight.

i like winter. (:

being martha

2008-03-16T16:47:00.006+08:00

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!"
"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

- Luke 10:38-42

i think as school and work and ocf and crossroads starts to pile in, i tend to easily forget about the reason behind what i do. maybe God has been misplaced from the picture, as i go through the motions and get involved with the technicalities.. too much commitments, too little time. i'm not as efficient as i hope to be..

With what shall I come before the LORD

and bow down before the exalted God?

Shall I come before him with burnt offerings,

with calves a year old?

Will the LORD be pleased with thousands of rams,

with ten thousand rivers of oil?

Shall I offer my firstborn for my transgression,

the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?

He has showed you, O man, what is good.

And what does the LORD require of you?

To act justly and to love mercy

and to walk humbly with your God.

- Micah 6:6-8

my God is Big

2008-03-13T22:58:00.003+08:00

Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.

-1st Peter 5:7

Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

The Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary,

and His understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary,

and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,

and young men stumble and fall.

But those who hope in the Lord

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles,

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint.

- Isaiah 40:28-31

O Lord be magnified.

2008-03-12T23:08:00.004+08:00

"When i consider Your heavens,

the work of Your fingers,

the moon and the stars,

which You have set in place,

what is man that You are mindful of him,

the son of man that You care for him?"

- Psalm 8:5

Job 38-39

(too long to be recorded)

"He determines the number of stars

and calls them each by name"

- Psalm 147:4

"And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered."

-Matthew 10:30

"And God saw that it was good"

-Genesis 1, the story of creation

"Would you discredit my justice?

Would you condemn me to justify yourself?"

-Job 40:8

"For You created my inmost being;

You knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Your works are wonderful,

I know that full well"

- Psalm 139:13-14

reliance, dependence

2008-03-09T00:13:00.001+08:00

"We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and He will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us."

2 Cor 1:8-10

sovereignty

2008-03-06T13:28:00.003+08:00

"The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And He is not served by human hands as if He needed anything, because He Himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. From one man He made every nation of men that they should inhabit the whole earth; and He determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us. For in Him we live and move and have our being."

We are His offspring.

Acts 17:24-28

repentance

2008-02-29T19:46:00.002+08:00

"Turn O Lord, and deliver me;

save me because of your unfailing love."

back in perth

2008-02-19T12:11:00.003+08:00

i've got about another 2 weeks more of school holidays left before the work starts to come in piles again. my initial plan of revising FA in the holidays failed miserably, but then again, that was before when i thought that i would join the masses of the unemployed. so theoretically, i didnt fail. heehee.

i'm slowly getting used to life here again, although there are moments when i look at the time and think of what would be happening if i were still working with innotrek; now for example, we would be rushing for washing point duty, getting ready to sit and shout at little kids who dont know how to walk around a bench instead of over it, at big kids who dont know how to tuck in their tshirts, and generally, at everyone who doesnt understand plain singlish. haha, the joys of being a trainer :P strange how something so short lived can make such a great impact in my life.

the weather has been rather pleasant so far, not crazy hot 40+ degree weather, thankfully. mid febuary is a good time to come back, better take note of it for future reference.

in the past 2 days ive been sitting in front of the telly watching dvd after dvd.. how awesome my life is. other than the extra 1.8 more hours that i've managed to fufill in my 25 hr driving requirement, i've been spending some quality time with yy and esther at home... although we should do more exciting things once in a while. oh well, at least tonight we're going to curtin to see glenna's convo! hurrah (:

i actually cant wait for school to start come to think about it. although the thought of having complete strangers in my tutes this time around (because i cant find any one taking the same combi as i am this time.. can you imagine having to do projects without kita or tasha? devastating hopefully i make/find friends in my tutes) seems rather scary and awful. but anyways, i'm looking forward to making new friends this semester.

finally, xiao's and my birthday picnic is tmr! yay! photos shall be up tmr, or as soon as possible. can't wait to meet up with the rest of the high school gang tmr (:

inno inno (:

2008-02-05T03:11:00.000+08:00

its been a good 3 full on weeks of becoming a freelance camp instructor. having done 5 camps and a day, teaching sunday school doesnt seem like a very daunting task anymore.

i think the thing i enjoy most during each camp comes in 2 parts: first, reading the comments about me on their evaluation forms, knowing how much by the end of the day whether i am appreciated/am not appreciated (mostly nice and good comments, except for the occasional random needs to smile more because mac said so, or dropped her glasses into the milo pond) and the latter being sending them home on their respective school buses at the end of every camp, simply because their faces says it all about how much they loved/hated those 3 days 2 nights away from home.

so what have i learnt? i guess i have learnt to become more patient, more giving, more loving. and i realise that there are alot alot more things to be learned, especially when i see the older trainers, or even the trainers in my batch, i see so many qualities and traits that i want to have and own. i guess it was also a time to admit my flaws, being lazy, having to put another's interest above my own and the list continues.. i look at the kids and their goals and objectives that they have set out to achieve through camp. fear of heights, fear of new environment, fear of being out of comfort zone, unity as a class. with each camp come and gone i see the fruits of their efforts; their courage, their faith, their determination. no wonder Jesus said to enter the kingdom of heaven you first have to have faith like a child.

in the past 3 weeks i have also made lots of valuable friendships. first came shafinaz, andrew, mel and wee ting, then came xl, sq, darylyn, kerenia, joayne, han wei, salman, alene, nat, calvin, then came amanda and shawn! i think my life has become alot more colourful with these weird bunch of crazy hyper friends. i think the eating together, sleeping together, laughing together, gossiping together, shaving together, cheering together, camwhoring together, to some degree crying together, looking out for one another just to name a few has made me feel like i belong somewhere on tiny singapore. so yay. give yourselves 16 inno claps. (: i cant believe another season has come and gone where i make new friends and have to leave them behind once again. but thats another thing i have yet to overcome.

life can be

2008-01-07T18:30:00.000+08:00

a strange yet wonderful, painful yet happy experience, journey, thing, all at once.
i am reminded of pastor noel's message at shineforth.

"Surely the day is coming; it will burn like a furnace. All the arrogant and every evildoer will be stubble, and that day that is coming will set them on fire," says the LORD Almighty. "Not a root or a branch will be left to them. But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall."
Malachi 4:1-2

things havent been the greatest, but lets hope we can soar on wings like eagles, run and not grow faint. faith isnt easy, at all.

maybe in the darkness somewhere we might just see a glimmer of light; maybe then we can be like calves and leap forwards, instead of tumbling into an endless spiral.

a quick word said in jest, can hurt.

2008-01-05T23:26:00.000+08:00

"When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from the desires that battle within you? You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight."
James 3:3-6, 9-10; 4:1-2

maybe just a word that came out unintentionally caused such a mess today, maybe i was just thoughtless, or maybe i didnt see what was coming. i remember in one of the bible studies of james we did this very passage and i once thought about situations like these that happened in the past: a sweeping statement that caused friction, or a stubborness which made it hard to be humble-all these causing unnecassary pain.

i wonder why God allows such pain in our lives.
i have come to realise though, that the pain was only a result of our own disobedience, our own discontent, our own sin; that God did not intend for us to be broken.

maybe what said tonight was out of our anger, out of our disappointment, but maybe what we have to work on, is probably humility, grace and forgiveness.

"But because of your stubborness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God's wrath, when His righteous judgement will be revealed."
Romans 2:5

mmm.

2007-12-20T10:37:00.000+08:00

i thought i should blog because i noticed i havent been blogging in the longest time..
so whats been happening with my life since the last update?

my housemates and i went on a roadtrip! saw alot of pretty and not-so-pretty things, had a whole lot of deep fried chicken to eat, went running on the first day and never bothered to exercise the rest, pet animals, and we had a really good laugh with each other. i think that trip was the best thing that ever happened this year, we learnt more about each other, e.g. how i cannot stop talking about defaecation, how to talk more to yy, become closer to esther, eliz and her music and her hyper talking, and debs, i dont know what i learnt about debs. hahaha. sorry. :P but yeah, we saw alot of beautiful things, God never ceases to amaze. there was one day that we were picking up seashells on the beach, and i was just thinking, boy if we were God, no one would be in heaven but ourselves. explanation: if seashells were men, and we only wanted the perfect pretty ones, then no one would be in heaven. okay, kristi's weird logic here. haha. (: but nonetheless a little something i took home from the trip..

i've been working alot as well at that little red restaurant called social. hee. (: its been fun bonding with my colleagues and even more sad because i have to come back to singapore and miss all the best nights ever, e.g. christmas, christmas eve, ny eve.. apparently they've got some really cool musicans/djs coming in to spin some tracks. ah! oh well (:

i am glad to be home though. it was the longest flight ever. my flight was delayed by 5 hours, so that made the whole trip 10 hours long just to get home. this was what happened: first the plane was still under maintenence at 12.45 when the plane was meant to leave at 1.15, so they announced that they would commence boarding at 1.15, 1/2 an hour later. we boarded at 1.15, then they said they couldnt take off because they hadnt loaded the cargo so we waited some more.. they then said they found a leak in one of them freight containers, so we waited while they decided what to do. then eventually they said that they needed to turn off the engines to clear the unidentified liquid so we had to evacuate the plane. after a long long time after, they finally got rid of all the liquid so we reembarked the plane. which soon after they said that we had to wait again because they needed to reload all the cargo onto the plane (which in that period was almost a whole movie's length). yupp. how dramatic this all was.

its hot here though. hot and sticky. i wish i was back in perth weather sometimes. its a funny familar kind of weird being home. its gonna be a wacky 2 months with friends here (:

just a tad.

2007-11-19T00:27:00.000+08:00

maybe its because i'm tired,
or maybe its because i'm just plain impatient.

i wish i had a car to clock my hours in, no one wants to let me use theirs. its understandable, but frustrating, i guess. looks like i wont get my liscence before i go back home.

maybe i just need to focus my attention into what's important, instead of what's not.
maybe i just need to stop thinking about what i want.

the two 18ths this weekend went ok, good time of catching up with others after exams, meeting new people. (: i was happy, even though i was just a bit tired, and just abit annoyed at certain things, but it was fun (:

i want to go to the beach.
i need to work.
i wonder how different things are gonna be next year.
i wonder if things could have been different this year.
i wonder how i am going to cope with so much on my plate next year.

too much thinking. i need some sleep. visiting swan valley tmr with debs, her sister and esther. yay! (:

love, in general

2007-11-17T05:21:00.000+08:00

i've been watching alot of How I Met Your Mother recently, if you dont know what this show is, its just another comedy, like scrubs, or friends. i guess although there's alot of stupidity and lame-ity going on in the sitcom, there's plenty of nice themes and stories under all that farce. there was this particular episode in season 1 that spoke about loving someone, i think it was marshall and lily talking to both ted and robin about how love was meant to be easy. when you finally met the person you're meant to be with, loving him is easy.

scarily, i think james said that before too.

since when was love ever easy? maybe i'm just being a tad bit skeptical about finding your "true" love, or maybe i just dont want to believe the half truths that television brings. maybe i've been fed with too many fairytales for my own good, or maybe its just that i cant bring myself to love anyone else other than myself...

drawing a parallel to my walk with God, have i ever loved God enough? maybe i can never love Him to the extent that He loves me, but i guess that one liner made me think about how if i had always been walking close to God, loving Him wouldnt be so difficult.

in my love,
You be lifted high.

in a lighter mood, guess who passed her driving test? 25 hours of driving to go, 1 hazard perception test, and someone's getting her p's! :D

i'm going to phuket!

2007-11-13T15:14:00.000+08:00

so exciting :D:D:D
we've got not enough money to go to hongkong ):
i suggested going to tioman, then shereen and jon were like why tioman? go phuket lah.

so we're going phuket! :D
now we're calculating everything in baht.
lets say we're budgeting 500 AUD, then that means we have S$665 which means we have $13,300 BHT. WE'LL BE SUPER RICH!
jon is even weirder, he's calculating everything we spend here in baht :S he's weird.

actually we're not really rich. not really. haha.
going to look at the pretty beaches there.
i spent my whole arvo looking at hotel reviews and places to see and eat and things to do.
and car rentals are SO cheap over there! :D yay!
i want to go see the national park, it looks so pretty and serene; the waterfalls look so pretty!! although i dont think the rest of them want to see it ):
i've pretty much planned the whole trip already (: whoopedoo!

we're gonna driving over either to phi phi island or ao nang in krabi, so exciting! the beaches look perfect (: although i think we have pretty beaches here in perth too (:

I CANT WAIT!

10TH feb to 14th feb (: what a nice time to go.
my birthday to valentine's day
then a mad rush back to sg and pack for perth and then fly back on the 15th
how hardcore.
how exhilarating.
(:

WHOOPEEDOOO (:

2007-11-11T22:13:00.000+08:00

yay, exams finished yesterday!! (: and if you're wondering if i got the day right, yes, we have exams on SATURDAYS. hahah

i'm glad everything is over and wow, i cant believe i made it through one year of uni just like that. i was just talking to ankita after the ob paper yesterday about how quickly this year has passed and how we're gonna be second years next year.. and we were like. OMG, 2nd year!!! i dont exactly know if its a good thing or bad thing, but who cares? 3 month summer holiday, here i come! :D

there so many things i wanna do this holiday. (: work, save money, go back to singapore and spend, go to hongkong, pass driving, roadtripping, have dvd marathons, go tan at the beach, mm. (: sounds nice.

woohoo! (: i'm so excited for this holiday. i think it will actually pass by in a whizz.. too quickly actually. and then school starts again, with an even heavier workload. ): i dont want to be in 2nd year.

still considering the role of bs leader next year. there's so many things to manage next semester i dont know if i'll be able to cope. i guess one thing on my mind is where my priorities lie. i guess its hard knowing that i have to work, study and manage friends, and on top of that have slack time and go for ocf stuff. is sacrificing one whole day to mediate on His word and prepare for bs really what i want? truthfully, i dont know if i can bring myself say yes to this question. should i take this step to trust in God, and believe that He will make time for me, or rather, in better words, that i should be making time for Him? maybe i've been giving too many excuses about hiding my hurt or that i'm not good or walking closely enough, or that i dont want to commit so much since i have no time.

maybe its because ocf is lacking in bs leaders that why i feel a need to serve. like how i feel i should go back to evangel to serve in youth ministry.

mm.

joel's visit to perth (:

2007-11-10T07:12:00.000+08:00

we went out for a morning yesterday (: it was funnn.. judy, me, will (joel's future housemate) and joel went out for breakfast with katie, joy, jon and sherene at barretts then we went to the beach to show joel around! then at the spur of the moment we decided to quickly show joel freo and then back to subi to have lunch at edo and pass by church to show joel how church looked like and then it was time to send joel back to his parents :'( anyway, it was a fun time of taking time off to spend with a long time no see friend and off from studies for abit. i'm kinda freaking out now though.. 5 hours till my LAST paper! happy but anxious because i know i'm not ready. lucky intro to law people finish all their exams in like.. 2 hours ): while i hang on for about another 7 hours. AHHHHH. killllll meeeee nowwwwww. anyway. photos!! enjoy (:

happy memories (:

2007-11-09T07:21:00.000+08:00

just decided to tidy up my blogger space, had too many blogs that never continued e.g. winter camp because i was trying out templates but chin wee did the wc blog in the end, and tester blogs etc. came across some of the old group blogs that i used to have (: check this out! here, and here.

putting up some photos! kudos to our resident cam whore, shereen who just whips our her nokia 6388 WHENEVER and WHEREEVER, but still, much appreciated (: you make my blog happy with pretty pictures..

and guess who's here? ;)

hurray!!

2007-11-08T19:38:00.000+08:00

YAY! one more paper down, and its the FINAL PAPER on sat!!
I'M SO HAPPY, SO HAPPY, SO HAPPY!

((:

time to get moving and lose some exam weight S:

in our weakness, be lifted high

2007-11-04T09:47:00.000+08:00

Jesus Lover of My Soul - Hillsong
Jesus lover of my soul
Jesus i will never let You go
You've taken me, from the miry clay
Set my feet upon a rock
And now i know

I love You
I need You
Though my world may fall i'll never let You go
My Saviour
My closest Friend
I will worship You until the very end

alot of things have happened recently, last night being the penultimate point of trust in God that nothing bad will happen. and maybe every night from last night would be a equally hard time to trust that God has everything under control in His perfect plan.

funny how everytime i read or hear something, it seems like God is trying to encourage me to keep persevering. this verse came up in the sermon today:

To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. - 2nd Cor 12:7-10

maybe being weak isnt such a bad thing. accepting our reality that we dont have the power to change things the way God can, is something that i really need to learn.

You've taken me, from the miry clay, and
Set my feet upon a rock

random songs

2007-11-02T10:34:00.000+08:00

i've been listening to random songs lately, those kind of music which you listen to when you study, not too rock or noisy.. just out of curiosity i just looked up the lyrics to one of the songs that is on my study music list:

Hide and Seek - Imogen Heap
Where are we? What the hell is going on?
The dust has only just begun to fall,
Crop circles in the carpet, sinking, feeling.

Spin me round again and rub my eyes.
This can't be happening.
When busy streets a mess with people
would stop to hold their heads heavy.
Hide and seek.

Trains and sewing machines.
All those years they were here first.
Oily marks appear on walls
Where pleasure moments hung before.
The takeover, the sweeping insensitivity of this
still life.

Hide and seek.
Trains and sewing machines. (Oh, you won't catch me around here)
Blood and tears,
They were here first.

Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that you only meant well? Well, of course you did.
Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that it's all for the best? Ah off course it is.
Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that it’s just what we need? And you decided this.
Mmm what you say?
What did she say?

Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth.
Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs.
Speak no feeling, no I dont believe you.
You don't care a bit. You don't care a bit.

Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth.
Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs.
Speak no feeling, no I don't believe you.
You don't care a bit. You don't care a bit.

um, i still really dont understand the lyrics. hahahaha. oh well (: nice music

coping with disappointment

2007-11-01T16:17:00.000+08:00

disappointment in itself can kill someone, or rather, disappointment is enough to get me discouraged and unmotivated.

i think its either i've been very unlucky in macro or i havent been putting in as much effort as i thought i did. i'd like to think its the former. maybe its because Paul Crompton doesnt like me, or maybe its because i'm too shy in class, or maybe its because i havent the capacity to understand this unit, all excuses that i like to form in my little brain.

i've been pretty disappointed with my grades recently. stat, ob, macro.. nothing much i can do about it now except to study even harder for exams and hope for a really nice grade that will pull up my term average. or maybe its just because i have very high expectations of myself. i want to get a HD for MA and stat, and hopefully a D for macro and ob, but it seems now that i've a lot of marks shy for a D in macro, and lets just not talk about ob, i havent started that yet. maybe and hopefully i will do well in MA and stat.

maybe i've been a little to disappointed to see how little i depend on God for wisdom. maybe i've been too tired of studying that i forget to rely on God for His strength.

remind me again of Your soveriegnty in all circumstances, remind me again of my priorities.

jon's bday dinner + afters (:

2007-10-31T21:27:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JONO! :D:D

Two are better than one,

because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,

his friend can help him up.

Though one may be overpowered,

two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10a, 12

to you.

2007-10-30T09:33:00.000+08:00

Taken from Psalm 91
May you dwell in the shelter of the Most High,
and rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
May you say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust."

Surely He will save you from the fowler's snare
and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with His feathers,
and under His wings you will find refuge;
His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.
A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.

May you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-
then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.

For He will command His angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

For the Lord says, "Because he loves me, I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges My Name.
He will call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life will I satisfy him
and show him My Salvation."

i pray you continually find deliverance through God's salvation and truth.

sin

2007-10-29T17:18:00.000+08:00

Isaiah 53:6

We all, like sheep, have gone astray,

each of us has turned to his own way;

and the LORD has laid on Him

the iniquity of us all.

iniquity [noun]
1. absence of moral or spiritual values; "the powers of darkness"
2. morally objectionable behaviour
3. an unjust act

i think recently i have been reminded again and again about sin, yet i chose to not hear. quite coincidentally yesterday's sermon was about struggling with sin (look at church website) based on psalm 51. the sermon wasnt really that great, but i think the one thing i took home from the whole service, was the reminder of how Jesus died on the cross for our sins, which 1, was iniquitous to Him, and 2, something which He hated but yet had the grace to forgive us for it.

i think a big theme throughout this struggle that i am having painted a very clear picture of God's grace and faithfulness, even when i didnt have the drive to be faithful.

truely and surely, God is faithful to complete the work in me until the day Jesus comes again. (philippians 1:6)

I will worship
I will worship You
- With All I Am, Hillsong

remorse.

2007-10-26T11:07:00.000+08:00

Psalm 51
For the director of music. A psalm of David. When the prophet Nathan came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.

1 Have mercy on me, O God,

according to your unfailing love;

according to your great compassion

blot out my transgressions.

2 Wash away all my iniquity

and cleanse me from my sin.

3 For I know my transgressions,

and my sin is always before me.

4 Against you, you only, have I sinned

and done what is evil in your sight,

so that you are proved right when you speak

and justified when you judge.

5 Surely I was sinful at birth,

sinful from the time my mother conceived me.

6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts;

you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.

7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;

wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

8 Let me hear joy and gladness;

let the bones you have crushed rejoice.

9 Hide your face from my sins

and blot out all my iniquity.

10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,

and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

11 Do not cast me from your presence

or take your Holy Spirit from me.

12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation

and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,

and sinners will turn back to you.

14 Save me from bloodguilt, O God,

the God who saves me,

and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.

15 O Lord, open my lips,

and my mouth will declare your praise.

16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;

you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;

a broken and contrite heart,

O God, you will not despise.

18 In your good pleasure make Zion prosper;

build up the walls of Jerusalem.

19 Then there will be righteous sacrifices,

whole burnt offerings to delight you;

then bulls will be offered on your altar.

turning point

2007-10-17T00:12:00.000+08:00

the past few weeks i havent been walking very closely with God. perhaps it was something that made me wonder about the possibility of God being unreal, being intangible, or perhaps it was something that made me question God's superiority, or even possibly that i took for granted God's grace given to me freely, even though i didnt ask for it, or could it be that i wanted to just test the boundaries, what it's like to feel tempted by the world? to feel part of the world. to have something to talk about with my friends when they ask "so what did you do in the weekend?" other than just going to church or attending ocf; being exciting, the way the world defines it.

i guess the past few weeks have left me pretty unhappy, unfufilled and lost. although i might have become more interesting in a way, what with asia cocktail and late nights, but i guess i lost the feeling of being comfortable with what i talk about. and today, by God's grace, i found it back again.

talking to a friend on msn made me see how much i had known God, and let me taste a bit of the goodness that i once had. i never lost God, i was just too blinded by things of the world to see how He was there all along. maybe this is yet again another journey of discovering God.

i came across this just now:
"If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember the words I spoke to you: 'No servant is greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the One who sent me. If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not be guilty of sin. Now, however, they have no excuse for their sin. He who hates me hates my Father as well. If I had not done among them what no one else did, they would not be guilty of sin. But now they have seen these miracles, and yet they have hated both me and my Father. But this is to fulfill what is written in their Law: 'They hated me without reason.'

"When the Counselor comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father, He will testify about me. And you also must testify, for you have been with me from the beginning."
John 15:18

it is pretty comforting to know that God knows what we will have to face as His people.

Kings club!

2007-10-11T23:05:00.000+08:00

and baby all i need...

2007-10-10T13:33:00.000+08:00

is a mug of hot chocolate right now, the weather has been so erratic the past few days. it keeps raining and then it becomes sunny and then it pours again and sunny again.. no wonder i fell sick ): thanks jeannie. hehe!

king's club starts tmr! so excited to see the kids again :D they are SO SO CUTE. i kinda miss crossroads already, although not going for both services sounds pretty good to me.. but i still want to interact with the children! i miss them. and ah! i miss north ): he moved away to northam which is very far in the country towns. AND I FORGOT TO TAKE A PHOTO WITH HIM. he left me a pretty picture though (:

anyway, i've been thinking of writing something more mature but then i cant think of anything to write. things have been going abit tough lately, with all the assignments piling in, friendship problems, friends who have problems and i've been pretty tired.. i just wish i'd get a hug to tell me i've been doing ok.

dear claire..

2007-10-07T15:46:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY!!

asia cocktail

2007-10-06T15:11:00.000+08:00

asia cocktail last night after bs, went with jaeann! (: it was funnn, great way to destress after the huge load of assignments..

me, jaeann

ben&benson (their names!!! so cute (: )
jian yuan (as i know him from tkd wayyyy back, aka jy) &benson
me and jaeann (:

i woke up at 6.30am today. and i have no idea why. probably cos the sun is rising earlier and earlier ): i need my sleep! but anyway, i had fun yesterday (: good company, good music, what can i say? awesome.

so it was the end..

2007-10-06T07:36:00.000+08:00

BS group 2007 (:

exchange trip

2007-10-01T21:22:00.000+08:00

i've been thinking about going on exchange since the day my mom asked me if i wanted to go on exchange.. it actually sounds quite exciting! (: hannah's on exchange at the moment and it looks so cool! so many places i can go. US, UK, france, denmark, japan, etc. i wonder if its possible to go to singapore on exchange ;) then i'll be home for a semester. (: that would be fun.. maybe there's some rule about going back to a home country for exchange. but frankly i dont see why not. mmm.

thinking thinking thinking.. AH! how fun would it be, God willing.

oh well. lets just get through this semester first and we'll see how things go..

some random photos.. (:

2007-10-01T11:23:00.000+08:00

change the world

2007-09-30T17:21:00.000+08:00

in the words of eric clapton, if (only) i could change the world...

theres so many things that i see around me that i feel so pained about, so many things that i feel like i have neglected, so many things that i cant do, i have no power to change. if only, if only i had the power to change the world.

i'm reminded of the liberty God has given me. the authority and responsibility that God has given me to look after His world, the influence that i can have over my friends, in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity. (1st tim 4:12)

but, given that, at times, sometimes i feel that God isnt working enough. why are there people suffering and He's not answering? sometimes i feel God can be so intangible: why isnt He reaching out to those who cry out to Him?

one thing i was reminded of when i was thinking about this entry: the only reason why i feel God seems out of the picture is because i dont trust God enough, in His timing, in His power, in His absolute knowlege and perfect plan.

i dont have the power to change the way the world works precisely because i dont know how to. i'm not the one who knows what has happened and what is to come. i can only see the time that i am in. and again, i'm the one who isn't pure, who isn't peace loving, who is love, who is full of grace.

and so i end in the words of john mayer, i will wait, wait for the world to (be) change(d) by God.

desire.

2007-09-29T11:30:00.000+08:00

May The Words of My Mouth

May the words of my mouth

And the meditations of my heart

Be pleasing to you

Pleasing to you

May the words of my mouth
And the meditations of my heart
Be pleasing to you
My God

You're my rock and my redeemer

You're the reason that i sing

I desire to be a blessing in Your eyes

Every hour and every moment

Lord i want to be Your servant

I desire to be a blessing in Your eyes

this song is taken from psalm 19:14. i came across this when i was preparing for crossroads tmr, and i was reminded of this song..

alot of recent events made me think about my relationship with God, how its been suffering, how i have been so conflicted by what i want and what God wants. i guess thats the struggle i go through everyday. i think its already become 2nd nature to just do whatever i want. and thats pretty much because i think i'm not in tune with God.

something made me see the extremity of choosing self over God, and it woke me up. i think i'm pretty scared of what can happen to me.

i feel this song describes what i want for my life. that every hour and every moment, that i will desire to be a servant of God, not a servant to the world.

there seems like so much i have to do to get back on track with God. i have to remember to read my bible, i have to remember to pray, i have to try my best to serve God in church, i need to open my ears to listen to His voice, i have to obey His commands, i have to love everyone. all these have tos and need tos.. reminds me of mary and martha actually. i think i've got the martha syndrome..

maybe christianity is not all about doing things to get back into the flow of things, to get in sync with the godly people, speak their lingo, have their dedication. maybe christianity is about just surrendering our lives into God's hands and just trusting in His plans and timing.

solace.

2007-09-25T00:13:00.000+08:00

i feel guilty for not caring about things that happen in anything other than the going ons in my immediate vicinity. so many things happen everyday. and all i care about, is how fat i look in the mirror, how i feel, how people treat me, my circles of friends here in perth. if only i spend some time talking to someone or praying about something, perhaps i could have made a difference.

sometimes i wonder why God gave us a choice.
He must really love us to let us have the freedom to choose our own self over Him, the Only one who is sovereign and true.

another smack in the face, another kick in the butt.

What A Friend We Have in Jesus

What a Friend we have in Jesus,

All our sins and griefs to bear!

What a privilege to carry

Everything to God in prayer!

Oh, what peace we often forfeit,

Oh, what needless pain we bear,

All because we do not carry

Everything to God in prayer!

Have we trials and temptations?

Is there trouble anywhere?

We should never be discouraged,

Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Can we find a Friend so faithful

Who will all our sorrows share?

Jesus knows our every weakness

Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden,

Cumbered with a load of care?

Precious Savior, still our Refuge

Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?

Take it to the Lord in prayer;

In His arms He'll take and shield thee,

Thou wilt find a solace there.

october blues

2007-09-24T11:45:00.000+08:00

and all the assignments are starting to come in and pile up on my table and i'm stressed because they are all due around the same period!

5th oct - macro essay
8th oct - OB assignment (group)
12th oct - stat assignment
19th oct -macro assignment (group)

roar. how do i find time to juggle work, ocf, church, school and PLAY?! :S

i want to take a year off school. and run away and never come back again. EEPS!

so much for going to the royal perth show this year ):

a matter of pride

2007-09-22T23:28:00.000+08:00

tonight was quite eventful, plenty of fireworks going on at home, since my mom, my brother and i are all squeezing in one tiny house with debs and youyan. and this is not sometime you'd want to try because i think when people get into my space i get agitated, annoyed and you wont want to come near me. i guess what i'm trying to say is, i think alot of the times when my mom, my brother and i quarrel, alot of pride gets in the way.

especially all three of us.
what can i say? we all come from the same family.

but seriously.

yesterday for bs we were talking about quarrels and fights in James 4, and how they are caused by our sinful desire and pride. i think alot of times we quarrel because we all think we're right, and even when we're proven wrong we still quarrel our way through just to make our point. and i am very guilty of that. i think its so hard for me to be humble.

God commands us to love our neighbour, not just Him. if we love God, we love our neighbour. why can't we just be humble enough to accept our neighbour as someone God loves and created in His likeness?

i think its because often at times i think that i'm superior to them so i look down on them. truth flash: yes kristi is a proud girl, very proud.

i remember one of my friend's mom sharing once before that so many times she tried to change her husband in order to suit her ideals, but she realised that the person she needed to change was herself. maybe its time that i change myself.

even so, words so easily put, actions so much harder to do.
i think i need alot of God to put me through this..

spring (:

2007-09-17T14:35:00.000+08:00

i havent been blogging recently, i just realised. but anyhoo,

ITS SPRING! (:
doesnt seem alot like it but it is. its been raining everyday since wed, gloomy and dreary, and i'm just getting fat sitting around at home and eating. but NOOOO, today is the day that i start my exercise again (: whee.

so some updates about my life:
last week was the one week break in our entire semester, it was quite good actually, busyed myself with alot of other things besides study. so that was good for me and bad for my studies.. :S but i needed it. school kicked off again today and i think i'm still in holiday mood. i wish we had a longer break but i think that would do me more harm cos i would probably forget everything by then.

msu ball last thurs at burswood and it was cool! (: i enjoyed myself.. photos coming up soon.. was uploading them last night and i gave up because they took so long..

i have my driving test coming up on thurs.. eek! i really hope i pass because i think i'm going to fail and that is not good.

i think thats about it. gonna be swamped in projects and assignments soon so i'm going to be really busy.. AH!

need to go off for class!bye!

part of God's plan

2007-09-02T23:40:00.000+08:00

how do we, the universe and every thing in it, God and His plan relate?

God created the world in 6 days, the heavens, the universe, the stars in the sky, the water, the plants, the flowers, the animals, from the tiny ant to the tall giraffe, and on the 6 day, He created Adam and Eve, and it was all very good.

it amazes me to see how the complexity of everything in the universe is so vast, it is so amazing that God created all of this for us, even though we are small and insignificant compared to God. God thought of what we would need, and He created it. He put everything in the universe under our care, our dominion, our control.

today i was reminded through pastor graham's sermon of how each and everyone of us are created in God's unique and perfect image. we all have worth because God has thought about us before we were even born, He knew everything about us. that goes how much to show how He put great care into planning our arrival into the earth, and shows how much He loved us to create us.

today i was reminded of how we judge people. as human beings, in general, we all judge others, situations and things in someway or other. the job is not too well done, she's too fat, he's so stupid etc. did we ever stop to think about how in everything, every circumstance, every situation, God is in control? did we ever have faith in God to entrust everything to His soverign plan? have we ever considered that every person that we judge is created by God and is part of God's intelligent design? wouldnt that be judging what God had initially spent time to think of and create that person we critise?

i can truthfully admit that most of the time, my answer would be no.

i think this is why we need God all the time to open our eyes to the things that we are blind to; this is why we depend so much on God's grace, mercy and love for all of us, despite all our shortcomings.

Who compares to You?

You who bring the morning light,

The hope of all the earth,

Is rest assured in Your great love.

No one ever will compare to You, Jesus.

-Magnificent, Hillsong

how about being a missionary?

2007-09-01T19:52:00.000+08:00

i was thinking about long term missions today. at NPD we were praying for various countries and it made me feel so blessed to have so much and yet they struggle to find peace. it made me think about the freedom we have to worship God freely, about the freedom that Jesus came down to give everyone on this earth.

i have so much to give, i have so much things that i can offer.
my time, my money, my talents, my faith.

except, i dont know if i can survive one year being in a foreign country.
persecution, war, chaos, etc.

looking to paul, and being the narrowminded person i am, i cant see how he could stay so close to God and how he could remain joyful even after everything that he went through, to bring others to knowing Christ.

but then again, arent i just putting my own interest above what God has commissioned everyone to do?
my security, peace, image, life, social circles, wealth.

i look to the korean missionaries being held by the taliban and i think, God must have really blessed them with His boldness and His strength to even survive one day under the captivity of the taliban. i look to the long term missionaries from church in africa, i think of how much they have to leave behind: family, friends and their jobs to persue after God's interest. i look at glenna's parents, and how they're sowing seeds into the people of hong kong, and again i'm amazed at what they have been doing.

again and again, i have been reminded of how God provides, be it in an ordinary OCFers life to how dependent all these missionaries are on God to just provide even their daily necessities; food, water, clothes.

i dont know what God is impressing in my heart right now, and looking at current circumstances, family, mentally, economically, spiritually, things dont look very good. doors seemed closed, very tightly shut.

sometimes i wonder why its so hard to choose the right step. prayerfully, by God's grace and by His plan, maybe i will have an opportunity, somewhere, someday.

library moments

2007-08-31T15:01:00.000+08:00

i am currently in the library trying to cram up on more macro stuff and i have finally decided to throw in the towel and not study. realistically, i dont think i can get any more stuff into my head. very good excuse, i must say. however i do need a break from econs :S

i am praying very hard right now, just to let you know.

tonight for OCF marks an ending of another fruitful term for the old LC and for the new LC, a fresh new beginning filled with anticipation. drawing a parallel from this, today i learnt of how to let go and how to move on.

there's also national prayer day/NPD for ocf tmr. i'm quite excited to see how i go as a group leader, hopefully i can gauge how difficult it might like trying to lead a group for devotion and prayer. maybe, just maybe, i might consider being stepping up to be a BS leader next sem.. continue to pray for me i guess (: as i try to figure out my role in OCF for the next semester. pray that i will have the courage again to step up to serve.

nat has given up studying too, maybe we should just go for a walk instead.

more updates soon! (:

my pride

2007-08-31T14:54:00.000+08:00

The Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector (Luke 18:9-14)

To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: "Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.'

"But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.'

"I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Take my life and let it be

conscrated Lord to Thee.

david's example

2007-08-29T16:43:00.000+08:00

Psalms 39:4-5

"Show me, O Lord, my life's end

and the number of my days;

let me know how fleeting is my life.

You have made my days a mere handbreadth;

the span of my years is as nothing before you.

Each man's life is but a breath. "

there are probably more than just psalm 39 and psalm 90 which remind us to live with the end in mind. i came across psalm 39 today while flipping through the first few pages of psalms and it just made me think about how currently meaningless physical life on earth can be, we are just but a vapour in the wind. yet the almighty God still gives us the time of day, hearing us at the whim of when we feel like talking to Him, otherwise we just leave him alone. its just like a math function.

i think it is important to remember that people like david was close to God because they relied on God to be used for His purpose. even people like david still had to ask God to help them when they struggled with being blind. even david, in all of his glory as a king, accredited it to God and continued to hope in the Lord.

so, how do we want to live our lives?

through the looking glass.

2007-08-28T22:01:00.000+08:00

when you looking into the mirror, what do you see? how do you see yourself?

as christians, do we aim and constantly try to live a life that is reflective of God's image?

here's a thought: perfection, per se, is not about us being the perfect human beings, but is about us being made perfect through what Jesus has done on the cross for us. Jesus came so that we can be blameless before God.

with this idea of grace in mind, do we strive to be a light to the world so that they equally have the chance to share this umerited, free love that God has shown to the world?

choice.

2007-08-26T19:41:00.000+08:00

when it comes for the time to choose which path you want to take, which would you choose?

sometimes i find it so difficult to walk on the straight and narrow, i find it so hard to follow God, especially when what i want is in a completely different direction from the direction God is pointing me in.

why do we as humans never learn to trust in God's perfect plan?

i guess it sort of helps to understand how we as humans will never be able to match up to God's perfection, and how we need to draw on God's strength everyday.

i want to watch ratatouille.

HOLIDAYS COME QUICK.

being of the world.

2007-08-25T19:18:00.000+08:00

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders,

and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."

Hebrews 12:1

but how, O God, do we endure this life which is so full of booby traps, so full of lies, so full of hurt, so full of imperfection?

by faith, my child.

"To the Lord your God belong the heavens, even the highest heavens, the earth and everything in it. Yet the Lord set His affection on your forefathers and loved them, and He chose you, their descendants, above all the nations, as it is today."

Deuteronomy 10:14-15

fat days are over!

2007-08-22T16:27:00.000+08:00

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,

whose confidence is in Him.
He will be like a tree planted by the water

that sends out its roots by the stream.

It does not fear when heat comes;

its leaves are always green.

It has no worries in a year of drought

and never fails to bear fruit."

Jeremiah 17:7-8 (NIV)

today i was having a fat day again, and i was staring at the mirror at myself and despising myself for not having a skinny enough body and not being able to fit into some of the clothes that i could early in the year. yesterday my boss's mother was at the cafe and she was commenting on how actually my legs were quite big but my arms were skinny (she said 其实你的脚很大zhi leh 但是为什么你的手那么瘦?) and i was trying to defend myself, saying how i used to go swimming and thats why i had muscles and they were becoming flabby cos its winter and i havent been going swimming, just to make me look better and skinnier in her eyes.

i dont understand why sometimes i get so unconfident in the way i look. i wish sometimes i had a high metabolism rate or i have small bones, just so that i can look smaller, or even shorter, so that even if i were chubby i would be chubby cute, not chubby big.

i guess over the years i have become less ignorant of my misplace of confidence and not let it affect me as much as it used to. i have come a long way. but today, today was a bad day.

but the still small voice in my ear questioned, "where does your confidence lie?" and instantly i was reminded of jer 17:7-8. "But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him."

the still small voice also comforted me, saying,

"For You formed my inward parts;

You covered me in my mother’s womb.

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Marvelous are Your works,

And that my soul knows very well."

Psalm 139:13-14 (NKJV)

"I have loved you with an everlasting love;

I have drawn you with loving-kindness."

Jeremiah 31:3 (NIV)

and i felt slightly better after that, knowing that even if the world hated how i look, God still love who i am because He created me in His own image (:

a tribute to mgs!

2007-08-21T21:40:00.000+08:00

today as i was chopping up carrots to put into the food processor at work i was reminiscing about the good old days back in mgs, where we chopped carrots for our biology lab sessions with our lab partners. i remember we did carrots for either our prelims or our O's. (: carrots have these cool star shaped middles. i remember we had to label the drawings, cortex... cortex.. i think thats all i can remember now. i also remember we had to put like the measurements and stuff, i really hated that. but plants were cool. i liked the flowers bit :D

i also remember the times when mr tay, in sec 4, would complain to us about the day and how he broke up with his girlfriend; or he would come in late for class every lesson and we would have free periods, or how he would show us random videos about the parts of the body; or even how we had bio right after pe and we would take our own sweet time to get back to class after pe and hang out in the toilet washing up so that we'd feel so much better from the sticky, humid, singaporean air. i remember the times when we had to dissect our pigs heart, or cow's eyeball, or pig's (? was it?) kidney for lab and there wasnt enough eyeballs in the market for us to buy so the whole class crowded around mr tay demonstrating the dissection on a fellow classmate's eyeball (the cow's one, not her's!); only to find out that a few days later, everyone in 4b2 had eyeballs but because their bio teacher wasnt around they dumped their eyeballs into the fish pond.

i remember the times in sec 3 when mrs cheong would come to class so excited about bio, making me excited about bio. i remember once we had to watch a very painful video on pregnancy, and it was about this woman who was going into labour and the blood and everything was so gross, and the baby's head popping out. i think. dont quite remember, all too long ago. i remember how fun interesting the digestive system was, learning about enzymes and hydrochloric acid, i remember drawing this chart and being so proud of it. i was so good at the digestive system. i think it was salivary amylase in the mouth breaking down starch, and oh! i remember fructose, glucose, and the milk one.. and there were many other carbo ones.. protein with protease et cetera et cetera. ooh and fat was the coolest. i remember the soaps and all breaking away from the main chain thing and then joining back together again. vaguely remember.

bio rocked my world. (: but then human bio in yr 12 was too much information that my tiny brain cannot store enough to understand the whole beauty of the human body, its functions and evolution. i guess i'm just happy enough to know that God's design was too intelligent for me to comprehend. hahaha!

ahh, i miss mg days. (: there's so much more about mg that i could ramble on about, 10 whole years of being there gave me a heck load of memories! for instance about the time where i had to spend detention on a saturday mopping the staff room floor when i was in sec1, all because i looked at a vulgar poem which my friend who was sitting beside me during a lesson wrote. owell (: it was fun being in the staff room anyway. i love my big fat pillar! (i like hugging this particular pillar in the staff room. it was nice and cold :D )

i remember being scolded by mr ng for fidgeting during assembly (which i always do cos i cant stand still) in sec 1 and in sec 4 we became really good friends because he was my ltc group teacher in sec3 and 4. it was fun having him around (:

i remember in primary 6 where me and kaye and some others would stay back for math remedial and then walk over to kfc in bukit timah plaza for popcorn chicken and bubble tea, or eat instant noodles at mobil across the road.

i remember in primary 6 when we had higher chinese we all cheated in ting xie for mo xie because we couldn't memorise the what seemed to be an incredulously long passage of about 7 sentences. (it just seemed hard cos of the big chinese characters and come on, it was higher chinese)

i remember in primary 1, i think my form teacher didnt really like me because i showed some kind of attitude, plus i didnt really do my homework, but i showed extraordinary talent for a bum: i did so well for my exams! i remember that my grades were all in the 90s in pri 1. how good was i! and the girl who sat beside me always copied my work -.-"

i remember in primary 4 me and nicole watched a musical potpourri and we wanted to join the pri school choir from then on. they sang walk dont run in the hallway, walk dont run i say... oh man! i still remember it. and bethel's sister and mom sang love in any language as a duet piece and i was in awe! then in pri 5 we joined the choir.

i remember in pri school we had all these weird friendship clubs and fights, in pri 2 nicole, nat and me formed the tesco club, which i have no idea why we called it tesco, i think cos when i went to england tesco was this supermarket and i stole some gift cards or some card which had the tesco name on it back, so we became a cool club which had its own real membership card. oh! i remember we wrote all these hate notes to each other. it was swell. haha, i remember i wrote one to claire in pri 5 to stop forcing nicole to do something or other, cant quite remember (nic, help me here!) and i remember i wrote something about how nicole's father was a lawyer and he could sue claire for it, and i remember i got into trouble after it because miss pook talked to me about threat notes.

i remember dance in mgs and how we had zaki in sec 1 and we all cried from his torment, but when we got to the performance we were all very happy because we had the most cheers from the crowd, i.e. we had a cool dance, which came with pretty costumes! kaleidoscope came and went in: i remember that we made such a big fuss about our costumes, especially the lycra short tights. it was awful! we changed it though. we wore jazz pants instead :P rebels!

i remember longest day and how we cried when we watched the video that our teachers made for us. we were the first batch that teachers actually made videos for! and it was so sweet. that day really made me miss mg so so much, and we hadnt even left yet!

i remember sec 4 and the eightofus (: and how we used to rush down to the canteen to eat recess. stingray at the malay uncle's store! or yong tau foo with the yong tau foo lady, where jiaen would just eat a miserable few fishcakes in a big bowl of soup. i remember for a period of time we tried to have a lunch box day which failed pretty badly because we never remembered to bring anything. i love everything about the 8! we still meet up every so often when i get back (:

i miss lovemg! this year is the second year that i havent served in lovemg. i miss the team! maybe in 4 years when i get back i can continue to serve in love mg, sowing back seeds which was sown into me so many years ago, by the faithful lovemg team (:

but anyways, look at the time, its 10:30 already! i think i should let pictures do the talking instead. i think i should leave some of my rebellious past aside so that i wont look so terrible in your eyes ;)

p.s. brendon! this is why i use Methodist Girls' School writing paper even now! i love mgs! :D

arrival.

2007-08-20T22:26:00.000+08:00

we were driving along west coast highway today heading towards bsf in duncraig when i saw the beautiful sunset from the car. the days are getting longer again! the sun set completely around 6:30 today, hurray. (: means spring is coming, where the pretty flowers bloom and the leaves sprout from the barren looking branches once again. (:

spring is pretty.

ever imagined the creation story? where God created the world in 6 days?

spring gives me a very beautiful image of it, or at least of day 3 (:

i can't wait!

"When i consider Your heavens,

the work of Your fingers,

the moon and the stars, which You have ordained,

What is man that You are mindful of him,

And the son of man that You visit him?

O Lord, our Lord,

How excellent is Your name in all the earth!"

Psalm 8:2-4, 9

plans for 2008

2007-08-20T11:46:00.000+08:00

recently debs, youyan, esther and i have been talking about plans for next year. we (youyan, esther and i, debs finishes this year) had been considering moving into a new 3-roomed place, but then i think we're gonna just stick to our current place, considering that rent has been going up everywhere. (: yay. i quite like my current house, even though it might mean that it might get abit crowded next year, but it already is currently the 4 of us most of the time, and 3 usually when we go to sleep, so i wouldn't mind :D with all the stuff i have accumulated this year, i think it'd be too much hassle moving again.

i think we're gonna all go on a holiday together down south at the end of the year to celebrate debs' last year here! i cant wait! it sounds so exciting. looking at how quickly time passes here (it's already been one month of school!) i think itll be quite fast to the end of this semester. hehe!

wheee. i'm so excited. last night we were thinking about how we were going to arrange furniture for next year so that we can accomodate for one extra person actually staying here. seems like we have to make a study outside, and recreate a living and dining area. but its so exciting :D :D

man, i should concentrate on studying now! dont know what to study for my MA tutorial assessment later on, it should be chapter 4 but we havent finished chapter 4! and we did chapter 3 last week in our tutes.. mm. and i only have mood for MA right now. roar. lunch soon anyways.

SUBWAY HERE I COME! :D

Death

2007-08-19T21:23:00.000+08:00

"But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body."

Philippians 3:20-21

Today in church an old lady diagnosed with cancer gave us a humbling testimonial of her faith in God despite her deterioration of her health. she shared about her struggle with not being able to recieve chemo and having to take radiotherapy instead, and that would only take away the pain and not prolong her life. but yet i think what most struck me was her not putting her faith and confidence in the things of this world. she never once complained in her testimonial about wanting to stay on this earth longer because she was certain of her citizenship in heaven, she knew that she was going to be taken home with God. the old lady was so joyful in her sorrow. i was so blown away by her courage, even in the face of death. this was what hit me in the face: our attitude to death shows how much we cling to this world.

if i were to die tomorrow, what would i regret the most? would i be as confident as the old lady was? Paul said in Philippians not to put our confidence in the flesh (Phil 3:3).

today made me think about what Jesus really came to do: to save us so that we might have life, and have it to the full. (John 10:10) we have all crossed over from death to the world to having life with Christ. i thought about the unmerited grace that God has so lovingly given us, that we do not have to gain our salvation through works.

today made me look at how my grandfather was saved. cancer also took his life away, but yet it is comforting to know that even in his last year of battle he was taken home to the Lord. and we can definitely be certain of his citizenship in heaven.

what do you cling to the most? is it the hope that God has given us? or do you cling to this world, knowing that you havent lived out the life that you wanted?

You have overcome the grave
Your glory fills the highest place
What can separate me now?

You tore the veil
You made a way
When You said that it is done.

Genesis 1: In the Beginning...

2007-08-18T18:20:00.000+08:00

today i woke up early for a little escapade to Matilda Bay to have a little moment with God. i looked at waves ebbing from the shore, i looked at the cotton wool clouds in the sky, i looked at the people kayaking around the buoys, i looked at the horizon in the distance, and i marveled at God's intelligent design. i felt the wind in my hair, i felt the sun beat down on my back, and i felt glad that i could experience God's creation. as i enjoyed my breakfast from barretts, there came this expectant seagull looking for a share of his breakfast. and i was reminded of God's providence. (Matt 6:26)

but how quickly we all forget God's marvellous and perfect design, and once i returned back to my world, the feelings of exams, tiredness, stress, worries, wanting to be nuah just overflowed out of me. roar, how easily we all forget God's providence and beauty, that even the birds of the sky are fed.

i was helping out at church this arvo for camp champions, a day camp for kids of families who stay in subi, and although the turn out was pretty crap (only 9 kids), i could still see the hearts of the other children's ministry leaders and how they got so involved with the kids and being enthusiastic about everything. playing with the kids was very exhausting, but it was worth it for the rare moments of joy. somehow today reminded me of me when i was a kid, just being so carefree, running around, playing, enthusiasm, not worrying about anything. the best thing about being a kid is also the innocence, the lack of shyness/boldness. the kids can just make friends in an instant! its so cool. there's so much things to learn from these kids. (:

crossroads tmr! (: i'm pretty excited for another day of children. cant wait!

Work Work, Study Study

2007-08-16T21:09:00.000+08:00

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

Hebrews 12:1-3

ROAR, today at macro i was bombarded again by the word midsems. its like another big slap in the face, right in the same spot as where MA hit me. ROAR. and how bad it is to have it the friday before macro, and i have an OB essay due on the same monday as MA! :S Not Very Good At All.

exams, oh exams. i dont mind sitting for them, as long as i dont have to get them back or have the grade permanently mar my GPA. MOOO. (sidenote: i dont know why i'm getting such a kick out of the animal noises)

oh well, i shall start working hard now (: i made a list of things to be done everyday until exams. hopefully i'll be able to cover everything by midsems, then maybe i can get a good grade at the end of the sem! hopeful for a HD for at least 2 units, hurray!

i guess pray that i would be able to continue on with the rest of this semester with a cheerful heart, and that i would continue to persevere in this race so that i might be able to complete it to the best of my abilities so that i can glorify God with what i had along the way, faith, hope, joy and trust. (:

RARH.

2007-08-15T15:48:00.000+08:00

i was reminded today of the Management Accounting mid sems and RARHHH, its SO SOON. 3 weeks moreeee. (ooh, but that means 4 weeks till a week's worth of holidays :D ) RAHH, all the exams are round the corner!

thank goodness there isnt a mid sem exam for Stats, i might fail :S AND RARHH, i just realised that picking up OB means that i have to write an essay of 1,500 words by the 3rd of sept. that means 2 things to be done by the 3rd of sept, OB essay and study for MA.

WAHLIEWWWW.

BLEH. I'M SO DEAD.

i cant help but think of how exciting the holidays are gonna be. (: HURRY HOLIDAYS COME QUICKKKKK!

afternote.

2007-08-14T08:32:00.001+08:00

haha, i think some of you think that i'm a bit crazy now, why does she still put her faith in a God that doesn't let good things happen to her? or that i'm brainwashed by this book i call the bible.

but i dont know, perhaps its just the way i know that God is real to me, i can feel God's presence, i can feel Him speaking into my life and i can be sure of my citizenship in heaven. God isnt someone who causes bad things to happen to me, sometimes He allows bad things to happen for reasons, so that i can learn.

being christian isnt about being perfect either, no one is. Jesus was the only human, in His time in earth, who was. it is about having faith in Jesus, having laid down His life on the cross, so that we may be free from the way sin has a hold on our guilt and shame and uncertainty with God. And so we rejoice that we have been set free, we are also grateful for the grace and mercy that God chose to have to pardon us. christianity is also a journey of discovering God and knowing His goodness, faithfulness and soveriegnty in all circumstances.

being christian is saying that we are weak, but by God's power we are made strong,
being christian is saying that we are blind to the things that we cannot foresee, but by God we can see the things that are to come, the things that we can be sure of, like heaven, and Jesus' second coming.
being christian is saying that even if i have faith as small as a mustard seed, God can still use that tiny bit of faith to show me the wonders that He can achieve.
being christian, is saying that God, i put You in control, i put the things of You ahead of me, and even if i fail, as all humans do, You still forgive, You still can make things right.
being christian is saying that i love God, and that God loves me too, with an everlasting love.

Faith as small as a mustard seed..

2007-08-14T00:40:00.000+08:00

"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing." James 1:2-3

at that point of time i dont know whether i should be disappointed or upset or be okay about everything and just move on from here. its like putting hope in something for nothing, sometimes i wonder why God even opened the door when He was going to shut it anyway. its all just a waste of preparing myself for it.

but then when i stop to process what seemed like a blow, i was yet again reminded of the lesson of God's faithfulness to me, and how i believe, as strongly as Dumbledore's Army believed that they could fight Voldemort, that God will continue to be faithful to me even through the doors that He has closed. God has been faithful, and i know that He will continue to be faithful. (phil 1:6) but i dont think i regret anything that has happened; i think all have brought me closer to the word of God, and understanding His purpose and will better.

it hurts and it smarts and it stings, even after thinking things through. sometimes i want to be immature about things, and just throw a tantrum or be stubborn or say something to hurt or even just fume away silently. but then i've come to realise that the way that i react, the things i do affect the way people feel, even if its just for that moment of pleasure to see them hurt the way i do. sometimes i wonder how Jesus had the love to forgive so quickly, and the grace to be kind.

to a certain extent i'm glad that even now, even in semi bitterness, God is always there to hear what i have to say, even though i dont want to hear what He has to say. i'm glad that God is loving enough to let me be wilful just this once, but patient enough to wait until i'm ready to show me other beautiful things that He can do in my life or use me for.

but yet to the rest of that extent i wish i could have some physcial comfort, i just want to be hugged and loved and be told that i'm still precious and i can still be used by God, even though i know it, very well.

but everything comes with a choice, and i think i still want to choose to be joyful over being stubborn, be patient over being angry, thank God instead of being reproachful.

All I Want To Do

All i want to do, is be close to You,

And all i want to say,

Is thank You for the way,

You love me, You love me.

Cos You are,

Faithful to all that You have promised.

And loving in all of Your ways,

Still with all of my failings,

You love me.

La la la la la la la la la la ~

Song In My Head.

2007-08-11T17:16:00.000+08:00

I have a couple of songs in my head and they keep playing on rerun, and i thought i'd just share it with you (:

I didnt know this song was a song at first, i'd always see it on other people's blogs and i just thought it was a poem about how Jesus died on the cross, and that was that, since i'd already known the whole story. But i guess songs have a funny way of making you listen to the lyrics properly, and so i really soaked in the words, and really, its a very beautiful song about God's love and grace for all of us and Jesus' obedience, even to death on the cross.

Nichole Nordeman - Why
We rode into town the other day,
Just me and my daddy.
He said I'd finally reached that age,
And I could ride next to him on a horse
That of course, was not quite as wild.

We heard a crowd of people shouting,
And so we stopped to find out why.
There was that man that my dad said he loved,
But today there was fear in his eyes.

So I said, "Daddy, why are they screaming?
Why are the faces of some of them beaming?
Why is He dressed in that bright purple robe?
I bet that crown hurts Him more than He shows.
Daddy please, can't you do something?
He looks as though He's gonna cry.
You said He was stronger than all of those guys
Daddy, please tell me why.
Why does everyone want Him to die?"

Later that day, the sky grew cloudy,
And Daddy said I should go inside.
Somehow he knew things would get stormy.
Boy was he right, but I could not keep from wondering
If there was something he had to hide.

So after he left, I had to find out.
I was not afraid of getting lost.
So I followed the crowds to a hill
Where I knew men had been killed,
And I heard a voice come from the cross.

And it said, "Father, why are they screaming?
Why are the faces of some of them beaming?
Why are they casting their lots for my robe?
This crown of thorns hurts me more than it shows.
Father please, can't you do something?
I know that You must hear my cry.
I thought I could handle a cross of this size.
Father, remind me why.
Why does everyone want me to die?
Oh, when will I understand why?"

My precious son, I hear them screaming.
I’m watching the face of the enemy beaming.
But soon I will clothe you in robes of my own.
Jesus, this hurts me much more than you know,
But this dark hour, I must do nothing,
Though I’ve heard your unbearable cry.
The power in your blood destroys all of the lies;
Soon you’ll see past their unmerciful eyes.
Look, there below, see the child
Trembling by her father's side.
Now I can tell you why...
She is why you must die.

This other song is a kid's song (: but i likeee... haha, this song reminded me of the response i should be giving to God for what He has done on the cross for me (: it comes with really cute actions too! (: the song is CUTE!

Lincoln Brewster - Let The Praises Ring
Oh Lord my God, in you I put my trust
Oh Lord my God, in you I put my hope
Oh Lord my God, in you I put my trust
Oh Lord my God, in you I put my hope

In you
In you,

I find my peace
In you
In you,

I find my strength
In you, I live and move and breathe
Let everything I say and do
Be founded by my faith in You
I lift up holy hands and sing
Let the praises ring
Let the praises ring

Oh Lord my God, to you I give my hands
Oh Lord my God, to you I give my feet
Oh Lord my God, to you I give my everything
Oh Lord my God, to you I give my life

lifter of my head.

2007-08-07T21:18:00.000+08:00

just read zhen zhen's blog and i feel encouraged.
sometimes i feel blue,
sometimes the way i think and the way God thinks are so completely parallel,
sometimes the things i want and the things that God want differ,
sometimes i struggle with the things of this world and things of heaven,
sometimes the conflict is too hard to handle,
sometimes i disappoint,
sometimes i am tempted and i get weak,
sometimes i sin,

but yet,
God is the lifter of my head,
God can strengthen my weak heart,
God is the lover of my soul,
God loves me so much that He gave up the One thing He loved most,
God created me in His own image,
and He knew me in my mother's womb,
He is my rock and my salvation, of whom shall i be afraid?
God is the Almighty healer,
and He is the Alpha and Omega,
the Beginning and the End.

i wonder, why this? why again?
RARHH.

my happy christmas cards ((:

2007-08-04T11:18:00.000+08:00

was doing abit of spring cleaning today, its rather scary how fast dust builds up in just 2 weeks, considering when i just came back here 2 fridays ago my room was still relatively dust free.

amazingly i realised that i had brought over my 2006 christmas cards from the brmc people back home and i have no idea why i did at the start of the year, but haha, am i glad that i did because they made me laugh at the things that they said, laugh at the memories from 2006 christmas, and laugh at the person i was in 2006.

several random thoughts:

1. the handwritings of kaye, sarah and eunice are so similar!

(okay so maybe more kaye and sarah than eunice but like the handwriting on the envelop was so similar i thought eunice and kaye's cards were from sarah! haha. oh well :D )

2. i had a really REALLY hard time deciphering who this card was from

(its from maurice. strange. it looks like maurice's name here, but i swear, it looked like mark and i was think why on earth would mark write me a christmas card when we hardly know each other? so i was thinking really hard and cheyyy, it was maurice. HAHA :P sorry.)

3. and while some guys have really hard to read handwriting, some have really nice ones (:

4. and in typical clement fashion, he makes his own christmas card.

simple but classy (:

5. its so amazing how someone from perth knows someone from back home :P

like take for instance, huilingling, she knows glenna banana! :D they were old neighbours! :D:D so COOL!

yay, (: thank you everyone for making my day by the christmas cards you sent last christmas. (: it's really wonderful! :D hopefully kaye will be able to join me this christmas in perth! :D going back to sg on the 19th of dec! so don't forget to write me an christmas card (:

vroom vroom..

2007-08-03T17:11:00.000+08:00

off for my driving lesson in like, 7 minutes (:

hopefully i dont crash the car.

but i just found out recently that we actually are contributing to insurance, so i dont have to pay a cent if i bang into something :D

i like my driving instructor's car

and ooh, hopefully i get into a parking lot by myself on the first try.

YAY! driving driving :D

good morning starshine (:

2007-08-02T11:12:00.000+08:00

yay, another beautiful beautiful day (: woke up to a really nice a warm morning (i was under 5 blankets) at 7.45am and rushed to school for an 8am lecture. HAHA, sounds familar? good old secondary sch days. i think i like the way steam comes out of my mouth in the mornings. and i like the way the sun shines down early in the morning and you can see the sun rays. normally by the time i get up the sun's high in the sky already..

but yeah, hurray to another beautiful day. such a pity i have to spend the rest of today at student cafe working today. mmm :/ oh well.

sorry james/jamin, i know we need more rain but i dont like the rain ):

rain rain go away.

2007-07-31T23:44:00.000+08:00

thank You Father for the beautiful sun that shone down today. (: its been so rainy the past few days that it had gotten dreary..

was somehow reminded of this verse,

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity."

Jeremiah 29:11-14

wait.

2007-07-30T23:12:00.000+08:00

waiting is too difficult a concept for me to grasp.

i grew up in a family where everything was done chop chop. eat fast, change fast, think fast, act fast, everything fast.

i grew up in an environment where everything needed to be done fast or you'll miss out. kiasu lah, they say.

so when it comes to waiting on the Lord, i just dont know how to. things go too slowly, and i get impatient and end up doing thing of my own, which obviously goes terribly out of order. i dont listen, i just rush through things, heck i rush through life.

kind of like Adam Sandler in Click.

mm.

food for thought.

help me to love like You do.

2007-07-28T21:40:00.000+08:00

To Be Like Jesus

To be like Jesus

All i ask is to be like Him

All through life's journey

From earth to glory

All i ask

Is to be like Him

"A new commandment, i give to you, that you love one another, as i have loved you, that you also love one another."

John 13:34

its so difficult to put what i'm feeling now into words because i end up just typing around a bush. so forgive me if i seem random putting up songs/verses. (:

God, my rock.

2007-07-26T10:45:00.000+08:00

Isaiah 53:12-13, 15-16
“12 I, even I, am He who comforts you.
Who are you that you should be afraid
Of a man who will die,
And of the son of a man who will be made like grass?

13 And you forget the LORD your Maker,
Who stretched out the heavens
And laid the foundations of the earth;
You have feared continually every day
Because of the fury of the oppressor,
When he has prepared to destroy.
And where is the fury of the oppressor?

15 But I am the LORD your God,
Who divided the sea whose waves roared—
The LORD of hosts is His name.

16 And I have put My words in your mouth;
I have covered you with the shadow of My hand,
That I may plant the heavens,
Lay the foundations of the earth,
And say to Zion, ‘You are My people.’”

**
i wonder why i fear the wrong thing sometimes when i have God watching over me and protecting me. hmm.

psalm 71

2007-07-23T22:54:00.000+08:00

Psalm 71
1 In You, O LORD, I put my trust;

Let me never be put to shame.

2 Deliver me in Your righteousness, and cause me to escape;

Incline Your ear to me, and save me.

3 Be my strong refuge,

To which I may resort continually;

You have given the commandment to save me,

For You are my rock and my fortress.

4 Deliver me, O my God, out of the hand of the wicked,

Out of the hand of the unrighteous and cruel man.

5 For You are my hope, O Lord GOD;

You are my trust from my youth.

6 By You I have been upheld from birth;

You are He who took me out of my mother’s womb.

My praise shall be continually of You.

7 I have become as a wonder to many,

But You are my strong refuge.

8 Let my mouth be filled with Your praise

And with Your glory all the day.

9 Do not cast me off in the time of old age;

Do not forsake me when my strength fails.

10 For my enemies speak against me;

And those who lie in wait for my life take counsel together,

11 Saying, “God has forsaken him;

Pursue and take him, for there is none to deliver him.”

12 O God, do not be far from me;

O my God, make haste to help me!

13 Let them be confounded and consumed

Who are adversaries of my life;

Let them be covered with reproach and dishonor

Who seek my hurt.

14 But I will hope continually,

And will praise You yet more and more.

15 My mouth shall tell of Your righteousness

And Your salvation all the day,

For I do not know their limits.

16 I will go in the strength of the Lord GOD;

I will make mention of Your righteousness, of Yours only.

17 O God, You have taught me from my youth;

And to this day I declare Your wondrous works.

18 Now also when I am old and grayheaded,

O God, do not forsake me,

Until I declare Your strength to this generation,

Your power to everyone who is to come.

19 Also Your righteousness, O God, is very high,

You who have done great things;

O God, who is like You?

20 You, who have shown me great and severe troubles,

Shall revive me again,

And bring me up again from the depths of the earth.

21 You shall increase my greatness,

And comfort me on every side.

22 Also with the lute I will praise You—

And Your faithfulness, O my God!

To You I will sing with the harp,

O Holy One of Israel.

23 My lips shall greatly rejoice when I sing to You,

And my soul, which You have redeemed.

24 My tongue also shall talk of Your righteousness all the day long;

For they are confounded,

For they are brought to shame

Who seek my hurt.

its good to be back.

2007-07-20T19:23:00.000+08:00

ahh, the fresh, cool air that you breathe when you step out of the Perth International Airport is something that i miss so much, at least compared to the heavy, stale air that Singapore has. its so nice to be back here, i've missed perth so much.

silly me left my brand new 2 week old ipod with a heck load of scrubs episodes in the Qantas aeroplane and i'm really really feeling very crummy cos i cant be more stupid that this. and i paid for it with my own money! $385 bucks can buy me a new wardrobe ): darn.

but other than that, its really lovely to see so many wonderful familar faces! (: so far: debs, glenna, esther, youyan, tim, steph.. (well of course raymond and jeannie but they're not counted since they've been back with me in singapore), and i'm gonna get to see everyone tonight cos its jason's farewell! so exciting, yet so sad. ): i cant believe he's leaving already. time passes so quick!

its so difficult to admit that i've become less singaporean everytime i return back there because i havent spent enough time with everyone from back home. everytime i come back to perth i feel like this seems more like home because i've just got everything here, friends, school, beautiful air, a great room, church, ocf; and its hard to have a balance between both since i only have time for one group of friends. its so hard to choose, since i had to make perth my home to be able to enjoy what God had in store for me. yet it always makes me wonder, everytime i leave singapore, there's always a 'what if'? what if i had stay on in singapore? what would my life be like then?

but anyways, i have to stop thinking about it.

my God is mighty (:

2007-07-18T23:27:00.000+08:00

Jesus Loves Me

Jesus loves me this i know

For the bible tells me so

Little ones to Him belong

They are weak but He is strong

Yes, Jesus loves me

The bible tells me so

children's min starts this sunday! the subtle email reminder from christa made me think about the stuff that i have to prepare for this sunday. i mean, i have already prepared for class, but then somehow i dont feel ready ): so scary, yet exciting! its so weird how now i'm so oriented to looking out for kids min stuff. i've been listening to children's christian songs, looking out for object lessons etc. mmm (:

pray for me as i am challenged each week to bring an interesting and fun way to deliver the message to the kids; pray for God's patience and love to exude me each week to each child; pray for these kids that they will be able to come to church each week with an expectant heart, and most of all pray that being the vessel that God is using, that i would be able to fill their hearts with the word of God.

i am weak, but God is strong.

a tribute to brendon

2007-07-18T02:02:00.000+08:00

introducing bren:

he has become my new msn buddy, a fellow insomniac.

he annoys me with his emoticons, which are all gross by the way. talk about sticking stuff into sheeps butts and up goats noses. eww.

he believes that i purposely sign off msn so that i can secretly win at msn games (hurhurhur ;) )

he is jealous cos i get to watch five whole seasons of scrubs and he doesnt :DDDD

he cant wait to get back to currie and i cant wait to get back to perth.

ahh. brendon brendon,

i will avoid currie at all costs so that i wont get kicked by you.

but thank you for spending hours on msn with me so that my boredom is reduced by half.

i'm coming back to perth, i'm coming back to perth. :D:D:D:D

snapshots.

2007-07-17T23:42:00.000+08:00